When chatting on Wechat, I suggest you be a little cold.

"I hate opening Wechat now. I get annoyed every time I see a little red dot.

because of the messages sent to me by others, I always can't ignore them. I have to get them back, otherwise I will feel particularly sorry.

but most of the time, I am so busy that I have to find time to go back and forth with people who chat with me. I am really too tired. "

A few days ago, I received a complaint from a reader backstage. In fact, her situation is quite a few.

as long as someone else is talking to you, you can't refuse, even if you don't have the time and mood at all.

as long as you are chatting with others, you must end by yourself, otherwise you always feel uncomfortable when you look at the news and don't reply.

others ask you for help, even if they are not very familiar with it, even if it is a bit difficult to ask for it, you will still go ahead and do it.

such people are generally called "good people".

but there is a saying quite right: good people are bound to be rewarded, but good people often don't.

We know what is trendy, all our elegant dresses for special formal occasions are an absolute must -have. Immediately after buying, you get a peace of mind.

whether on Wechat or in life, good people who don't know how to reject others and are always thinking of others think they are satisfied with them, but don't want them to take it for granted.

you think too much about the feelings of others, but you don't realize that they just treat you as an injustice; if you are too aggrieved by your own feelings, it will only make you sad and sad in the long run.

in fact, what you should do is not to be liked by others, but to yourself.

even if the real you are sometimes selfish and sometimes make the other person unhappy, the most important thing is not to let yourself be wronged.

I quite agree with what Cai Kangyong said:

"I don't think it's too warm, it's the best way to maintain a good relationship with others, and it's harder to be tied up by the word" warm ".

I advise you to be a cold person and learn to be indifferent so that you can be completely warm. "

it's not a bad thing to be a cold person.

Wechat chat, suggest you a little cold, your own time is also very precious; interpersonal communication, suggest you a little cold, do not give enthusiasm to meaningless people.

many people try to be enthusiastic and considerate. In the final analysis, they don't want to be hated and want to be liked.

but what you need to know is that you can never be liked by everyone, and you don't have to expect everyone to understand you.

everyone sweeps the snow in front of his own door, and what others see is often what he pays attention to.

as for whether you are enthusiastic or not and how much you help, they don't really take it to heart.

you helped him, he may just be a light "thank you", and do not feel a little favor to be grateful.

if you refuse him, he may complain that you are too cold to help, but he may not really hate you for it.

in interpersonal communication, one of the major principles to make yourself comfortable is not to take yourself too seriously in the minds of others.

as psychologist Adler said, "you don't live to meet other people's expectations, and others don't live to meet your expectations."

Don't care too much about what other people think, and be the most authentic and free you are.

keep proper indifference and distance in order to make yourself more comfortable.

I remember that a good friend once said to me earnestly: "you can never be considerate of everyone."

I agree with you very much and have a lot of experience.

many people always think that the more friends, the better, but they do not realize that the relationships that require you to work hard to maintain are often very fragile.

once or twice without speculation, after a period of loss of contact, the relationship may gradually wear away.

it's not anyone's problem, it's just that everyone's time and energy are limited, forcing yourself to be well-rounded and maintaining a good relationship with everyone will only make you physically and mentally exhausted.

as the writer Yi Shu said:

"people in the city look glamorous, but in fact, they all hide loopholes. High-ranking friends are full, and guests come like clouds, but there may not be three or two who can really talk to each other. "

Friends do not lie in many, but in excellence.

it is enough to have a few people who can speak from the bottom of their hearts and talk about their hearts.

therefore, what we should do is not to be enthusiastic on Wechat and to have both sides in reality, but to abandon those who are useless to socialize and cherish those friends who are really worth maintaining.

I like this sentence very much: "I am not talkative or indifferent, but there is no need to talk and laugh at everyone."

A mature person will not dig his heart out to everyone, because he knows that enthusiasm is meaningful only to those who are really worth it and understand.

for the rest of your life, I suggest you be cold, be yourself, don't force yourself, don't pretend, just be who you really are.

, good night.