I didn't expect my shame to arise under such circumstances.
for example, like when I was a child, I always woke up on weekend mornings to my mother's tinkling sound of cleaning.
my mother came on the weekend, sleepy, I only saw her walking around the house, like wiping things, like moving newly bought food into my refrigerator.
I never know exactly when she got up.
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realize all the time my mother "wasted" on me, the waiting time, the undisturbed time, the time to take care of my life.
We often hear:
"if I had known it would be like this, I might as well stay in the company and work overtime to make money."
We have all sent out similar words more or less, essentially complaining that "I wasted my time coming home" and "I wasted my time facing my family".